As you probably know, I've been getting therapy for many years now, since before I came out as trans. I respect my therapist tremendously and she's helped me in ways I could never have even imagined. I don't take for granted just how lucky I am to have her.

Through my recent struggles, the past week or so has brought with it a rather huge breakthrough, in that a core concept that she's been trying to get through to me finally made its mark: the significance of my inner child.

While discussing my fear of failure and fear of rejection, she eventually led me to the point where I realized that at the core of my struggle, I had been speaking to - or disciplining, if you will - my inner child in ways that weren't at all appropriate for her. I'd always been a sensitive child, and in many ways, I've never stopped being one.

So really, how could I expect to get through to her by being as harsh and strict with myself as I have been for so long?

I was inspired to make this at the end of our Friday session. There's more to follow after it.

When my therapist made clear to me what I needed to do, the awareness of how completely I'd mistreated my inner child and neglected to check in with her - with us - dawned on me. It hurt to think about, being entirely honest.

How could I get her to trust me again after how much I'd been berating her for her honest mistakes? After she'd tried so hard to fix things in spite of being so scared of punishment? After she'd done her best not to do it again, even if she did? Needless to say, the sweet little thing needed a far gentler touch if I was to reconcile with her and rebuild our relationship again.

While drawing her, I tweaked her design bit by bit as I polished up the sketch, but all I knew going into it was that she wouldn't be at either side of the pupbun scale. I think I landed on the perfect balance between the two for her.

I'm happy to report that we've already made progress since then, and I think we've made amends. Now, the proper work and healing can start, but you can rest assured that you'll be seeing more of her soon enough.