Quicktober! Quick draws for instant whims.

It's Halloween, and there's more costumes to enjoy!

At first I'd intended to do two for each of these two final posts for Quicktober, but once I got to four, I realized I was pretty much halfway done - and came up with an idea for everyone (with one exception, which you'll see below).

The poses and detailing work on all of the costume sketches were extremely fun to do; I felt like I was in the flow for the entire set, and I think it really shows through in the art.

For this set, we have Chili, Antoinette, and Me! Can you guess who we're dressed up as? There's clues and answers hidden below.

Did you guess them all?

With that, Quicktober is done! What a trip it's been. For a while since starting it, I've felt like this wasn't as ambitious an undertaking as Kinktober in 2023, but sitting with that feeling a little longer, I think I made up for the lack of colour and linework that I showcased back then, with quite a bit of storytelling and doubling up on several of the ideas I made every day.

I'm proud of having gotten it done, and what I got done as a result of it, too; especially with a lot of the other challenges I'd been dealing with this month, and not having missed a single day despite, at times, feeling like I really, really wanted to.

With that said though, you might have noticed someone missing! That's because my friend MoT was kind enough to make a costume for Chip while I was working on the first ones of these on stream!

It's such an amazing piece! Look at the BuBuy²!!

Welcome to Quicktober, where I literally just come up with whatever I want day to day, and force myself to spend no more than half an hour on each main element of the sketch.

Chip (my little facet) can be an absolute menace when she wants to be, and combined with her absolute mastery over military-grade puppy eyes, she knows she can have and get away with just about anything if she really wanted to.

Drawing this on stream and continuously upping the ante (heh, pupping the ante..) with the weaponized cute was the most fun I've had with doing the cute entirely on purpose.

How could you ever say no to a face like that??

My latest return home has once again proven challenging to me, and last night was especially difficult. I decided to stream and work on some art that came to mind while I was struggling, and I'm both very pleased with the results and feeling better for having made them all.

First we have one that sums up my issues with pursuing what it is I want for myself. I struggle with asking for things in the first place, so when it becomes a problem then I don't even know where to start.

One stylistic detail that ended up being a little too subtle in the final piece to easily notice is that I used a different brush for the linework in either half - I felt like they helped further convey the feelings held within me that the dialogue and posing might not have on their own. I also realized halfway through the process that I actually hadn't drawn kid chocolate exactly on model, and looks more like a midpoint between the two of us. I didn't bother "fixing" it since that has plenty of implications that I think elevate the piece even further.

Next is this one, which captured the vibe of more recent experiences, such as this weekend's.

Given the above context, I think it should speak for itself.

One year ago today, my puppygirl egg got shattered. A lot happened that built up to that one key moment, but that was the absolute point of no return.

Since then I've gotten to enjoy a whole slew of new sensations and experiences I certainly otherwise wouldn't have, and even helped many other girls discover and learn more about their pet-aligned aspects as well. It's all been especially fun for me.

I wouldn't trade Puppy for the world. I'm so happy to have finally accepted this side of myself, cause she's genuinely helped me thrive ever since then, and for a long time to come too, I'm sure.

This is a little late for the exact date, but I didn't want to let that stop me from finishing it. I was quite fond of how it was turning out by the end of my birthday stream.

This is also quite novel for me; showing all three "me"s in a single piece - and yes, I know that's getting increasingly convoluted to keep track of in recent years - but I tend not to draw my bunny and puppy selves separately all that often, and I realized I'd been neglecting my inner child lately, so I figured she deserved the treat as well. Given that they both surfaced over the course of my 38th, it felt fitting and fair to include them both.

As always, thank you for supporting me to get as far as I have. As they say, I'm another year wiser;

But my god, what a hell of a year to be wiser by.

This admittedly is a rather new genre of personal art that has left me feeling ways that I honestly don't think I was fully prepared for.

I'd largely categorize a lot of what I've made in recent months as "vent" art. While I try to create things in ways that conveyed my feelings clearly, and that's often a challenge - they're still ultimately meant to express and share to get those feelings out of my system. This is focused on accepting it within myself.

It hasn't solved the problem, nor has it made the core feeling go away, but I certainly feel a lot less bad about feeling it at all in the first place. It's given way to a whole slew of new thoughts and emotions that were being held back by my refusal to accept this as an okay way to feel, but needless to say, that's a pretty big step in the right direction.

I've stared at that last panel for hours since I made this just yesterday.

As you probably know, I've been getting therapy for many years now, since before I came out as trans. I respect my therapist tremendously and she's helped me in ways I could never have even imagined. I don't take for granted just how lucky I am to have her.

Through my recent struggles, the past week or so has brought with it a rather huge breakthrough, in that a core concept that she's been trying to get through to me finally made its mark: the significance of my inner child.

While discussing my fear of failure and fear of rejection, she eventually led me to the point where I realized that at the core of my struggle, I had been speaking to - or disciplining, if you will - my inner child in ways that weren't at all appropriate for her. I'd always been a sensitive child, and in many ways, I've never stopped being one.

So really, how could I expect to get through to her by being as harsh and strict with myself as I have been for so long?

I was inspired to make this at the end of our Friday session. There's more to follow after it.

When my therapist made clear to me what I needed to do, the awareness of how completely I'd mistreated my inner child and neglected to check in with her - with us - dawned on me. It hurt to think about, being entirely honest.

How could I get her to trust me again after how much I'd been berating her for her honest mistakes? After she'd tried so hard to fix things in spite of being so scared of punishment? After she'd done her best not to do it again, even if she did? Needless to say, the sweet little thing needed a far gentler touch if I was to reconcile with her and rebuild our relationship again.

While drawing her, I tweaked her design bit by bit as I polished up the sketch, but all I knew going into it was that she wouldn't be at either side of the pupbun scale. I think I landed on the perfect balance between the two for her.

I'm happy to report that we've already made progress since then, and I think we've made amends. Now, the proper work and healing can start, but you can rest assured that you'll be seeing more of her soon enough.